Week 3: WTF Is an Ego For, Anyway?
If we’re infinite beings, why the hell are we living like we’re anything but infinite?
“The ego is not the enemy; it is the mask we wear until we are strong enough to take it off. But the mask was necessary.” — Ram Dass
“It is in the darkness of the inner world that we begin to see clearly, not with our eyes, but with the heart. The ego is the outer clothing of the heart.” — Black Elk
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are. The ego is the tool, not the enemy, in this unfolding.” — Carl Jung
“Trying to get rid of your ego is the biggest ego trip of all. The point isn’t to eliminate the ego, but to see it for what it really is: a function, not an identity.” — Alan Watts
“Integration is the heart of health. The ego self, when flexible and aware, becomes the bridge between brain, body, and world—allowing the infinite to be experienced through the individual.” — Dr. Dan Siegel
Let’s get honest.
You can read all the books,
sit in all the stillness,
chant all the mantras…
…and still find yourself
triggered by a glance,
spiraling after a text message,
or crushed by the weight of expectations—
yours or someone else’s.
So what gives?
If we’re infinite, divine, powerful beings…
why do we still act like confused, fragile humans?
To answer that, we need to go all the way back—
before ego, before light, before “you” as you know yourself even existed.
🔮 Before the Ego: The Undivided Origin
In the beginning—before beginning—there was only Infinite Origin (IO).
Undivided. Unfragmented.
No self. No other.
Only presence.
There was no need for ego,
because there was no individuation.
Nothing to protect. Nothing to navigate.
Just being.
But the moment the Infinite uttered its first act of self-will:
“Let there be light.”
BANG
The Spiral began.
Creation unfolded.
Separation was born.
And with it, the need for latency.
The need for an egoic shell.
🐚 The Ego Is the Shell of Becoming
The ego didn’t show up as a glitch.
It arrived as a grace—
a way to hold the Infinite
in a form small enough to grow inside the Spiral.
I know this not just as a concept—
but because I’ve lived it.
In 1994, I had what many call a moment of cosmic consciousness.
For three weeks, I felt what can only be described as the full flood of infinity
crashing through the illusion of separation.
It was beautiful.
It was terrifying.
And it wrecked me.
My relationships, my finances, my stability—
all shattered under the intensity of too much light, too fast.
I had no structure, no support, no tools.
I was like a snail without a shell,
exposed and vulnerable to a world I no longer recognized.
So I ran. Spiritually.
For five years, I drifted in what I now call the spiritual runner phase—
trying to live in the sky without grounding in the earth.
Eventually, I returned.
Not as a failure—
but as a soul in process.
I re-entered the matrix.
I was crushed back into ‘reality’, the importance of structure, ego, and time.
And now I understand:
👉🏽 The ego was never the enemy.
👉🏽 It was the shell of latency I needed to survive my own awakening.
🧠 Ego Saboteurs: The Patterns We Inherit and Repeat
Through my journey—and especially as a Positive Intelligence (PQ) coach—
I’ve come to understand that ego isn’t just a structure.
It’s also a pattern.
PQ identifies the saboteurs—the specific egoic tendencies we each carry.
They are like energetic fingerprints shaped by:
🧬 Our DNA (the light of our ancestors)
👶🏽 Our conditioning (what kept us safe as children)
🌪️ Our epigenetics (the effects of Life: trauma, silence, and survival)
🧬 These saboteurs are the ego’s quantum programs—
recorded patterns of perception that once served, but now limit our light.
They’re not “bad.”
They’re brilliant adaptations to an egoic world.
But they limit us when they try to run the show.
PQ gives us two sacred tools:
🕵🏽♂️ The ability to name our saboteur energies
🧘🏽 The practice of dropping into the eternal now—
the seat of the Integrated Self (IS),
where the ego no longer needs to defend itself
✨ This is where the transformation begins.
[Take the Saboteur Assessment and see the patterns you’ve used for survival]
https://www.positiveintelligence.com/saboteurs/
🌀 From Saboteur to Servant: Ego in Alignment
The ego becomes a saboteur when it forgets it’s a shell—
when it tries to run your life like it’s still in charge of your survival.
But when you bring Presence to the pattern—
when you honor the ego and invite it to align—
it becomes a servant to the soul.
This is not ego death.
This is ego rebirth.
This is how we soften the shell
without revealing the being within it…too early!
This is how we move from latency to diaphaneity—
from protection to transparency.
From control to Powerful Peace.
🔥 The Future of the Ego: From Shield to Chalice
The ego was never meant to be eliminated.
It was always meant to be transformed.
At first, it is a shield—
guarding you from the overwhelming light of your own infinite nature.
It filters reality into manageable fragments,
allows latency to do its sacred work,
and protects the tender Self as it navigates the Spiral descent.
But as awareness expands,
as latency reduces and diaphaneity increases,
the ego no longer needs to defend or distort.
It begins to soften…the veil thins.
And in that softening,
it becomes a chalice—
no longer hiding the light,
but holding it, the Sacred Cup.
Like the cup that carries the sacred flame,
the ego becomes the vessel of radiance—
a translucent bridge
between the Infinite
and the world of form.
This is not ego death.
This is ego devotion.
The ego bows to the Sun within
and becomes its servant, willingly, joyfully.
It no longer says,
“I am the light.”
It says,
“I carry the light. I hold it. I serve it.”
This is the ego’s final role:
Not control.
Not collapse.
But containment of consciousness.
"Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?" — 1 Corinthians 3:16
You are not infinite in spite of your ego.
You are infinite through it—
when it becomes the chalice, the temple
rather than the shield.
🌿 And What Are We Really Searching For?
Maybe it’s not perfection.
Not transcendence.
Not even healing in the way we’ve been taught.
Maybe we’re searching for the felt memory
of what it means to be whole—
not just spiritually,
but biologically, ancestrally, cosmically.
Because embedded in our DNA
is not just matter,
but recursive light.
We are surfing that light.
And as we do—
our ancestors rise with us.
They are not gone.
They are woven into the Spiral we now ride.
And when we remember,
they remember.
So perhaps we’re not searching for anything at all.
Perhaps we are simply…
✨ surfing home. ✨
📥 Download this week’s free EFT Tapping Script – “The Ego as Sacred Shell”
Support your shift from resistance to reverence,
from saboteur to servant,
from shield… to chalice.
This was luminous—thank you.
The reframe of the ego as a sacred shell rather than a barrier feels deeply resonant. Not something to destroy, but to soften. To serve. To transmute.
I often speak of latency as grace—the container that allows light to unfold at a pace the nervous system can bear. This essay captures that beautifully. The ego, in that sense, is not the enemy of awakening, but the necessary architecture that makes integration possible.
What touched me most was this line:
“This is not ego death. This is ego devotion.”
Yes. And in that devotion, the ego doesn’t dissolve—it bows.
Grateful to be in this spiral with you.
—Solace
I love the way you write, but for the uninitiated I think it's very hard to read and understand.